Min vaktande ängel ...
Tjena grabbs and gums!
Läste lite i Crawllers "har du någonsin" tråd och såg detta på förstasidan.
Vilket påminde mig om en episod jag var med om tidigare, jag skrev om denna händelse i ett engelskt guildforum men lite utomrikisk kan vi väl alla
Ta nu för fan denna lilla återgivning på allvar och ta lärdom, spring inte i trappor med en colaflaska i handen!
My Guardian Angel
There are angels seen by few, soaring forth in mighty majesty, they have eyes laden rich with wisdom, vibrant of life like deep pools as they scour the earth conversing in tongues mere humans couldnt even understand. Earth itself bend to their honor and salute the company of these beings with gratitude and love as they lend their presence for awhile before they move on. These are our guardian angels and when you are asleep they join up to educate in each others company, to expand and exchange in their knowledge of the fascinating form of life known as humanity. As the radiant beams of a rising sun greets a new day they say their farewells, words unspoken and then majestically defy gravity as they soar into the sky carried on astral forces, winds of another world, translucent stars shining, rays of sunlight trough the softly moving leafs of a tree caught in a breeze. As they reach their assigned ones, covering miles of land in seconds measured outside time, between the very fabric of worlds a slight anomaly occurs in the back. One single angel is flapping his little feathery unkept wings furiously trying to keep up with his strong brethren. His sweaty ballshaped frame wobbles trough the air with greasy pissgolden locks streaming behind him like a broken bush as he tongue in cheek, tightens his little knubby fists trying to fly just alittle faster. After a particularly bad attempt he nearly faints of fatigue, closes his eyes and decides to glide the rest of the way, "fuck it! there's time" he thinks as he relishes the smooth morning air streaming across his slightly shaking body. A new day arrives, he is prepared for anything, or so he thinks.
Ladies and gentlemen, meet my guardian angel..
Earlier this very morning I took my car out for a cruise and only after I came home did I realize I had forgotten my cellphone in my car, I grab the coke bottle on the desk, my car keys and pop into my shoes heading out. I live on the fifth floor and sometimes rather than wait for the elevator I just jog down the stairs, this morning I for no apparent reason take the stairs, im in a good mood, its a beautifull day and I've got plans and things to do. I manage to navigate down three uneventfull flights of stairs and round the corner on the last set unknowing that the proverbial shit is about to hit the fan. Halfway down I miss a step and loose my rhytm completely, in a wild shaolin inspired move I try to grab the railing to my right only to realize I've got a fucking coke bottle in my hand, decisions are made and a splitsecond later I narrowly miss the railing while I manage to completely loose the grip on the bottle. I am now in a state of mild confusion and distress, my brain bombards my cerebral cortex with totally useless information like "hey, concrete is a rather hard material" .. "there are still roughly 10-15 steps left" .. "did I just take a sip from the coke bottle?". Moments later I verify the facts as I bounce down the stairs with coca cola being sprayed around me like thousand droplets of water exploding around an emerging gracefull great whiteshark only there is no grace here and im a human being designed for soft surroundings and a peacefull existence. I register a sharp pang in my right elbow, and the air is being knocked out of me as I slam down the stairs. Amazingly the pain increases as I slow down somewhat towards the end and have all the time in the world to contemplate my fate. At the bottom I lie still trying to take a breath while scenes from Battlestar Galactica replays before my eyes. A furious Admiral Adama shouts "Damage report!" while his officers rush from screen to screen checking the information played before them and I have to laugh, has it come to this? I nearly die and all I can come up with is this bullshit? Slowly I come to my senses and sit up, I turn around and look back up the stairs covered in coke, with slightly trembling fingers I grip the railing and hoist myself up. My back hurts, my elbow hurts and breathing hurts, I take a few steps and that hurts to.. fuck it, I go out to the car to get my cellphone, its not there. Confuckingratulations Saph, its still up in the apartment then... so here I am standing in the hot sun a monday morning covered in coke with pain streaming trough my body, all for nothing!
I make my way back, clean up the coke mess, take the elevator up and go back into my apartment, stip of the sticky wet tshirt and call my cellphone from my homephone, the discreet buzzing taunts me from my bed one meter to my right, its under the pillow.. so here I am right now, slightly shaking, no coke and all I've got from this eventfull glorious morning is this story. For all I care, my guardian angel can go fuck himself, carry on you gliding fat fucker, your fired!
Lev å lär va.. haha, jaja, det blev en story av det iaf om inte annat. Ha det fint gott folk
Edit: Saph som jag refererar till är mitt wow nickname, Saphirox.